Category: mental health

Clear Your Clutter

I say it at the start of every year: Clear your clutter. It’s not healthy to live in a cluttered house or with a cluttered mind. You’ve got to make room. Out with the old, in with the new. Create some space. That’s the way to move forward.

Even if you don’t have new resolutions this year—even if you don’t believe in making resolutions, it’s a great time to make way for new opportunities. Be open to the idea and interesting things might just start to happen. You absolutely never know what’s going to happen when you wake up in the morning. You might have your routine, but what if the doorbell rings and a package is delivered that changes the course of your day? Your life? It could happen. But do you have room for that opportunity? You’ve got to clear your clutter.

Getting rid of the baby toys now that your kids are 7 and 10 years old is an obvious one. But what about the nagging voice in your head telling you you really should get a physical this year? What about the exhausting ongoing argument you’re having with your sister that keeps you from spending holidays together? That’s all clutter, too. You can continue to live with a closet full of baby toys and Christmases spent with your husband’s family, but is that how you want to start another year? This is the time. Clean your slate and make way for the new.

Resolve to Make Resolutions You Can Keep

Resolutions again? Already? How can that be possible, when you haven’t even gotten started on your 2013 resolutions yet? Are you planning to just say “ditto last year’s” when the time comes? Don’t do it!

If you tend to make heartfelt resolutions year after year that never get off the ground, can we make the assumption that something’s got to change? If you’re with me still, let me try to help.

A resolution is lofty. It’s a grand thing. You’ve got a clean slate, a fresh window of opportunity to succeed. But do you have the bulleted list that goes under the big, bolded Resolution #1 prepared? In other words, do you have any idea how you will make Resolution #1 happen? If you don’t, your lofty goal might remain just that—aloft. A pie in the sky.

For example: Say your big Resolution #1 is Lose Weight. That’s great! It’s wonderful that you recognize this need in your life. But what’s the plan? I can hear you now, “Oh, you know, eat less. Go on more walks. You know.” No, actually I don’t. That doesn’t sound like a plan to me. A plan that will work sounds something like this:

  • Research exercise options in my neighborhood.
  • Email that trainer Debbie recommended.
  • Try one recipe a week from that new cookbook Mom gave me for Christmas.
  • Ask Mary if she’d like to walk with me two days a week.
  • Get a (free) food journal app to track my diet.

…and so on. In other words, your resolutions—and I mean all of them, not just diet and exercise-related ones—need sub-resolutions. Especially if you are someone who habitually starts a year with stale, cold resolutions from the previous year.

What if you get off to a slow start? Don’t you dare say, well, there’s always next year. Realize that a resolution can bubble up any old day of the year. In fact, one thing I love to do is keep a “## things I want to do before I’m ##” list (e.g., 42 things I want to do before I’m 42). Why not? Every single day is a new opportunity, not just January 1. Resolve to keep your resolutions this go-round, but don’t despair if July comes around and you haven’t done much about Resolution #1. Find a way to make progress in July. Take ownership of the things you want to change in your life. You are the only one who can!

Set Your Intention

One of the things I love most about my yoga class happens before we even begin to move. You might think “it’s a yoga thing,” but it doesn’t have to be. Before we begin our workout, we set an intention. By “intention,” the teacher doesn’t necessarily mean you must box yourself into an “I intend to get better at…” statement…not at all. What she means is: Take a moment to acknowledge (or for some, discover) why you’re here.

Sound silly? Well, think about it next time you’re about to go out for a run, as you’re lacing up your sneakers. What’s your intention? Where did the desire/need for this run come from, and what do you hope to gain from the experience?

My workout becomes significantly more, well, significant after I set my intention. Some days I simply say a word of gratitude that my body is healthy and strong and allows me to do the hard work of Bikram yoga when there are plenty of people who wish they could do it, but for some reason can’t. Some days I extend that little secret wish to my family…health, happiness, peace for all! It’s a moment to say a little prayer. But very often these days, I find myself actually focusing on an intention, like “Use this practice to breathe and release the day and create more patience in my daily life.”

Perhaps even more important than setting that intention is being reminded of it later in the session. Coming back around to it, and realizing that, hey! All those thoughts swirling around in my head when I came in, they really did leave my brain over that hour. And I do feel calmer and more in control. I believe in my intention. It comes with me when class is over, even when I’m no longer thinking about it consciously.

So my suggestion for you is this: Before you begin a workout, look at yourself in the mirror. That might be the hardest part for you, but that’s why you should do it. Ground yourself, recognize the “you” you see in front of you. Then let your eyes settle on your eyes, throat, chest, wherever, and set an intention. What motivates your workout today? You say, “I wanna lose weight, that’s all.” But is that really all? It’s a respect for yourself that’s driving you, is it not? Affirm those deeper voices that nudge you into your athletic shoes when you really feel like falling onto the couch. Dedicate your workout to someone or something. Make it more than a calorie-burning session. Because it is!

Cleanses and Detoxes and Superfoods….and YOU??

What's in your stash?
What’s in your stash?

Where do you fit in with all these trends? Is it all hype to you? Or are you on Day 3 of your please-don’t-mention-food-to-me juice cleanse?

Does your diet have enough color, variety, antioxidants, nutrition, ahem, produce to keep you healthy? It is so hard to know in this age of powders and mega-nutrients packaged affordably and at eye-level, making us question whether we really are getting enough sea vegetables in our daily intake of normal-people food.

I myself have bought into it, to a degree. I mean, I have my shelves of nutritional supplements, including Spirulina, chia seeds and “Power Fuel.” I do feel good about these few add-ins, but in truth, I wonder if I even need to take my daily multivitamin anymore, now that I’m hyperconscious of every bite I take, and now that plants have become the largest slice on the pie chart that is my diet. If I consciously eat bell peppers simply because I haven’t had enough color in my diet yet today, I think it’s likely I’m at a point where my diet doesn’t need supplementing.

But what if it does? The constant barrage of news and findings in the media keeps us wondering, and there’s just something about second-guessing when it comes to your health. You don’t want to do it.

So, what’s my advice? As usual, everything in moderation. That means, if your heart is telling you it’s time for a juice cleanse, then try it. But don’t do 30 days; do 10 days. Take a look at the supplements out there, then take a look at your diet. Know that the supplements are not going to do the work of a good diet. They are not going to keep you healthy if you swallow them and then sit down to a greasy hamburger. My advice is to always eat consciously, aware of the nutrients you are consuming. Only then can you decide if your diet is lacking in something. If you scan the aisles at Whole Foods the sheer number of supplements available can be overwhelming…even enticing. But necessary? I’m not so sure.

Meet a Real Fitness Girl: Chrissy

This girl's on a roll.
This girl’s on a roll.

Chrissy has been working out with me for about a year now. Her workouts range from Jazzercise to Roller Derby, and I’ve watched her lose weight and change hair colors over this time. What follows is her real-life exercise story.

KTFG: When did you start really getting into working out?
CW: I have worked out off and on since high school. I belonged to Gold’s Gym back then. I have had many ups and downs on the scale and in my physical ability. On August 1 2012 I started my latest (and last!) re-start to exercising and eating better.

KTFG: What was your workout of choice?
CW: Early in my workout days I did aerobics and slugged away at the stair climber. My father was a body builder so I have dabbled in weight lifting since I was a kid. I much prefer the aerobics and have always enjoyed the social aspect of fitness classes.

This go round I have been doing Karen’s Core and More Class and Jazzercise. Both are hard but are fun and social. I think the one thing I am missing is I need to add in a once a week yoga class. Oh, and spinning, I was on a spinning kick for a while and miss it. I bet my padded shorts are too big now… ok, sorry. I am addicted to workout gear.

Recently (July 2013) I joined the Roller Derby Rec League. It is an awesome way to burn some calories while having fun. I will roller skate for hours but refuse to run. Ok, well, if some bad guys were chasing me I would run but… only if I had no choice.

KTFG: What do you do when you feel like sitting on the couch, but you know you really should get up and exercise?
CW: This particular scenario is not my issue (right now). I have built my days around exercising. I put my workout clothes on in the morning, drop my daughter off at school and head to Jazzercise. I HATE being out in public in workout clothes IF I am not working out soon. I much prefer real clothes and get super mad at myself if I wear workout clothes and do not work out.
However you do need to build in a day off where you have permission to “sit on the couch” or whatever variation of that recharges you or you will go crazy.

KTFG: How do you self-motivate?
CW: Presents! I buy myself new stuff the MINUTE anything gets too big. I am addicted to buying new workout stuff. I am really looking forward to rewarding myself with some of the nice expensive stuff when I get closer to my goal weight. For now I hit Marshall’s every couple of weeks.

KTFG: Where do you see yourself down the line in terms of physical health?
CW: I am strangely healthy for someone who has so much weight to lose. But I do want to maintain and improve my health. I want to be one of those people that looks like they are getting younger rather than older.

KTFG: What are your goals?
CW: I have long had a “secret” goal of becoming a Weight Watchers leader. But you have to get to and stay at “goal weight” to do that and I have not managed that yet. Also I am working towards becoming a Jazzercise instructor. So I guess my answer is that I want to be healthy and fit enough to be a Weight Watchers leader and Jazzercise instructor so that I can help other people change their lives too.

KTFG: How does weight training fit in with your other workouts?
CW: I do hand weights in various ways to at least 2 – 3 songs per workout.

KTFG: How does it make a difference?
CW: It helps improve my strength in everyday life. I live in a townhouse and lugging groceries up the stairs is much easier when I am working my arms with weights.

KTFG: What advice would you give to someone who knows she needs to be exercising/eating a healthy diet but just can’t imagine how to begin?
CW: 1. Find a way to make it social. Walking with a friend, taking a class, anything that gets you moving AND is fun.
2. Make your workout time concrete on your schedule.
3. Believe that you deserve to be healthy and happy! And when you are, you will be a better you for yourself and everyone around you!

A Good Time for Transformation

The way I see it, life is pretty mundane unless you’re working on some sort of transformation. Giving up smoking, becoming vegetarian, becoming a parent—whether it’s a small or huge change, there’s a reason every year begins with New Year’s resolutions and the excitement about “starting fresh.” Life would be a long walk on a treadmill if we didn’t throw some challenges in its wake every now and again.

We love us a good transformation. It’s my favorite part of a talk show—when they show the grizzly bear of a man in the “before” picture, and then have the Men’s Health cover-ready version walk out on stage in the “after” version. Or the dowdy woman who has never cut her hair or shopped at a mall who walks out in a trendy new ‘do and J. Crew outfit? Forget about it. It makes me tear up. And I just bet it has the same effect on you.

In my world, the transformations I see most often are flabby to tight. Weak to strong. Heavy to much, much lighter. Carnivore to herbivore. Mindless to thoughtful. You see, becoming a healthier being is not just about waking up early to get your 30 minutes in at the gym. It’s also about transforming yourself, mind, body and spirit. Imagine you are going to be the guest on that talk show: what would your “before” picture look like? And what about the “after”? What is it you hope to transform?

I consider myself a constant work in progress. My body—that’s a given. I’m always finding ways to push myself to higher boundaries. But spiraling out of that is the diet transformation, which has gone from vegetarian to mostly vegan, always looking for more ways to be more plant-based and learning, learning, learning…. It’s genuinely a thrill. Then there’s the spiritual, metaphysical part of me that’s goading my transformation from a reluctant successful trainer to allowing myself to ask, what if? What if I do allow my business to blossom? What if things get big? What if?

I do love a good walk on a treadmill, but I can’t imagine being stuck on it for too long. I stay inspired by watching the transformative successes of my clients, and by creating new challenges for myself all the time. What does your “after” picture look like? What small steps can you take now to get yourself from here to there?

If you’re daydreaming you’re not working hard enough!

Get out of your head for a minute.

So says my highly motivational spin instructor (who might not have known that gem was working till now…). What I get from that—my spin on it, if you will—is “be in the moment.” That also happens to be one of my resolutions this year.

It’s so simple, really, the idea of just being. Being present. Focusing on what is happening right where you are. Yet we are a multitasking society, so we sort of forget how to just focus on one thing. Now going back to one thing at a time has become my resolution; I bet at one point I resolved to get more things done at once! Oh well….

Continue reading “If you’re daydreaming you’re not working hard enough!”

Spotlight on a Fitness Girl

Jeanee’s fitness story.

At a brunch date in 2005, I listened to Karen’s stories about training clients and teaching classes in her neighbor’s loft. At the time I had a membership at the Y I rarely used, and before that, I belonged to an “artsy” gym where I exercised in spurts. Most of my workouts felt directionless, and no one cared whether I pushed myself or slithered off the elliptical machine a little early. I realized I was missing two elements that are now crucial to my exercise routine: accountability and socializing! I signed up for weekly personal training and group Pilates with Karen, because I knew she would care about me showing up, working hard, and enjoying myself.

I have plenty of body hang-ups and areas I’d like to improve, but envisioning a better figure doesn’t motivate me. The fulfilling relationships with the ladies I work out with are what get me off the couch. I have many good reasons not to blow off my scheduled workout with Karen: I know that she’s hired a sitter, that her free time is precious, and that we’re going to swap stories and laugh while I plank. I also like to attend the same yoga classes each week with teachers who take a spiritual approach. They’re almost like my gurus, so if I ditch, I miss out on wisdom I can use on and off the mat.

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Word on a Wall

Put your goals where you can see them.

Think this one through, because the answer you choose might be staring you in the face every day for a year or more. What one word or phrase should you write on a piece of paper and place on a wall at eye level so that you will have no choice but to see it every single day?

Mine: Be responsible for the energy you bring into the room. 

It’s on a small, pretty piece of paper on a cork board about 2 inches above the screen where I am currently typing. I don’t just see it, I read it, every day, actually multiple times a day, and it helps.

Continue reading “Word on a Wall”